WHAT DECIDES IF YOU HAVE A NORMAL HEAD OR OTHERWISE?

I have always wondered why some males have very big heads while some have less than what I think is the normal size of a human head. Thanks to my curiosity, I noticed that fathers and sons always share a similar circumference of head size – except in cases to justify the extended stay of a family thanks to the landlord’s unusual graciousness. In such a case, I would to use the landlord’s head as a point of reference. Why? Because I believe that some of the landlord’s graciousness mush have rub upon the wife (get what I mean?).

I later got to realize that despite using the landlord’s head as a point of reference (or that of the pastor that’s always coming to pray with the woman when her husband is not around), sometimes there is no correlation between the point of reference and the subject’s head. Don’t ask me to check the madam’s driver’s head or her boss that likes taking her on business trips; I don’t have time for that, besides I don’t like to meddle in family matters. Well, I thought for a while before I remembered one of the things I learnt in secondary school; that which I think solves this riddle.

What did I learn in school? I learnt that there has to be some sort of model for another organism of the same specie to follow, it is that model that determines what that organism becomes when it comes into existence. That is why humans look like humans and dogs look like dogs. So all I need do is find a model, a model that determines the size of the head of the resulting individual. You see, this even solved how the females get their head too – so you don’t get to call me a bigoted chauvinist.

So what exactly do I think solves this riddle? It is certainly not the mother’s head or the grandparent’s head or some other person’s head you must have thought of. It is something more spectacular… Sperms!

I want you to really consider this: each sperm, although containing the needed DNAs and other stuff to produce a pikin, has an independent body, purpose, life. If you agree with me on that, particularly on the individual body, you must agree that they have different heads. So what’s the point? The head of any individual is directly proportional to the head of the fertilizing sperm, simple! I’m a genius shey? Thanks.

So the bigger the head of the fertilizing sperm, the bigger the head of the individual. It is as uncomplicated as ABC.

You know what that means? If all your children have big heads, you certainly have some big-headed sperms in your “something” (or your husband’s as it applies). Plus, if you could select the sperms that results in your children, well you should choose one with just the head size that you want for your kid.

At this point, no one should ask me if this has been verified scientifically, who knows maybe the brains in their fertilizing sperms cannot come up with stuff like this; or how I came about such a discovery or worse… if my fertilizing sperm had a big head.

Your comments, questions, beefs and insults are more than welcomed!