WHAT DECIDES IF YOU HAVE A NORMAL HEAD OR OTHERWISE?

I have always wondered why some males have very big heads while some have less than what I think is the normal size of a human head. Thanks to my curiosity, I noticed that fathers and sons always share a similar circumference of head size – except in cases to justify the extended stay of a family thanks to the landlord’s unusual graciousness. In such a case, I would to use the landlord’s head as a point of reference. Why? Because I believe that some of the landlord’s graciousness mush have rub upon the wife (get what I mean?).

I later got to realize that despite using the landlord’s head as a point of reference (or that of the pastor that’s always coming to pray with the woman when her husband is not around), sometimes there is no correlation between the point of reference and the subject’s head. Don’t ask me to check the madam’s driver’s head or her boss that likes taking her on business trips; I don’t have time for that, besides I don’t like to meddle in family matters. Well, I thought for a while before I remembered one of the things I learnt in secondary school; that which I think solves this riddle.

What did I learn in school? I learnt that there has to be some sort of model for another organism of the same specie to follow, it is that model that determines what that organism becomes when it comes into existence. That is why humans look like humans and dogs look like dogs. So all I need do is find a model, a model that determines the size of the head of the resulting individual. You see, this even solved how the females get their head too – so you don’t get to call me a bigoted chauvinist.

So what exactly do I think solves this riddle? It is certainly not the mother’s head or the grandparent’s head or some other person’s head you must have thought of. It is something more spectacular… Sperms!

I want you to really consider this: each sperm, although containing the needed DNAs and other stuff to produce a pikin, has an independent body, purpose, life. If you agree with me on that, particularly on the individual body, you must agree that they have different heads. So what’s the point? The head of any individual is directly proportional to the head of the fertilizing sperm, simple! I’m a genius shey? Thanks.

So the bigger the head of the fertilizing sperm, the bigger the head of the individual. It is as uncomplicated as ABC.

You know what that means? If all your children have big heads, you certainly have some big-headed sperms in your “something” (or your husband’s as it applies). Plus, if you could select the sperms that results in your children, well you should choose one with just the head size that you want for your kid.

At this point, no one should ask me if this has been verified scientifically, who knows maybe the brains in their fertilizing sperms cannot come up with stuff like this; or how I came about such a discovery or worse… if my fertilizing sperm had a big head.

Your comments, questions, beefs and insults are more than welcomed!

Poetic License (or Poetic Nonsense)

While I was growing up, I used to read my dad’s books. Then, he had a book on English literature which dealt on literary terms. One of them is Poetic license. I was confident I understood the term then; after a while, I wasn’t sure anymore.

I had always believed (like many of my readers), that Poetic License referred to the disregard by writers and poets for grammar and pronunciation rules. Several events have challenged that belief. As such, I decided to dig deep into the concept and my findings were revealing.

Poetic License is not just a flagrant disregard for conventions as many understand it. It is an appeal to transcend the world of conventions to express the unconventional. It is described as “a freedom that polite society allows poets so they can enlighten us and achieve certain effects or work within the constraints of certain poetic forms such as rhymes or meter”¹. It is an act with an end in mind; an end that must justify the act.

For example, if a poet decides to write:

I want to have my dreams for breakfast

One possible interpretation is that he wants to see his dreams come true. In this case, he is using language in an unconventional way to express his wish. This is a good use of Poetic License.

Poetic License is not an inherently positive concept; it can also have negative connotations. This means it can be used wrongly. This would result into poetic nonsense. This poetic nonsense is what we should guard against. I understand that the world of poetry allows a wide space for the use of Poetic License but it should not be abused.

The abuse comes when it is used for the sake of using it, without a desired effect. Many times, when it is obvious that someone is using words wrongly, he would just appeal to Poetic License rather than admit his wrong. This is not to be so.

I remember a session I had with fellow poets some time ago. We were reading our poems aloud in turns to the house. After anyone had read his poem, we would ask questions on why certain words or even lines were in the poem. We then discovered that many times, we are often carried away that we just use words because we feel we have the right to. That is not how it should be done.

For example, imagine someone wanted to write:

I shall exalt your heart over all else

And ended writing:

I shall exult your heart over all else

It is obvious that a mistake has been made. “Exalt” and “Exult” may share some similarities but they are two very distinct words. But rather than admit their mistake, some people will immediately appeal to poetic license.

I am not saying every word has to express a lofty idea or concept. The words may just be for exaggeration or humour or something else. The point is that it should serve a purpose. Furthermore, writers and readers alike should be conscious of the fact that a word “used for the sake of it” might have another change the interpretation thereby obscuring the general message of the writer or poet.

So the next time we feel compelled to exercise our Poetic License, we should ask ourselves: what do I want to achieve with its use? That way we would exercise our poetic license correctly and not produce poetic nonsense.

Your comments, suggestions and questions are welcomed.

¹www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/what-is-poetic-license

Be Thankful

Dear Reader,

I welcome you to 2016, a year of endless possibilities. I trust that you are as optimistic as I am about the good things that will happen this year.

There is one way of tapping into the endless possibilities of this New Year: Be Thankful. This is one sure way to enjoy the blessings of 2016 and beyond. It applies to all of us, regardless of our situation or status in life.

Being Thankful is beyond saying the words “Thanks” or “I am Thankful”. It is a representation of the inner state of one’s mind, a mind that is thankful for whatever comes its way.

Why should we be thankful?

There are many reasons to be thankful but I will discuss just two. First, we should be thankful that we are alive. Our lives may not seem as much, we might be going through some major challenges, or fighting some extremely demanding battles, but we still should be thankful that in spite of the challenges and battles we are still alive.

That is something worth being thankful for! Many people will probably not last as long as you did in your present situation. The fact that you are alive means there is hope yet and something will work out in the end. Accept it, you have something to be thankful for. Don’t forget to be thankful for all the good things that have come your way too.

The second reason to be thankful is that we made it into the New Year (and I guess many people are thankful for this). I like to think of the New Year as a new beginning. I know there are many things that you can’t just start all over again; but you can always renew your mind, have a new perspective.

The New Year is a new wave, it is another chance to do whatever you are doing the right way and for the right reason. It is life giving you a second chance, another shot to continue the good things and get rid of the bad ones.

What are the benefits of being thankful?

For starters, it gives a positive outlook to our lives; it inspires hope within us. When we are thankful, we are expressing a state of mind that is grateful for all that has come our way. That way we view everything in our lives as blessings; blessings that will manifest someday.

That creates an inner peace within us, a peace that is predicated in the fact that we have made it this far and a hope that things will eventually work out well in the end. That peace eases our fiction with others and affords us a better outlook at life.

With this, we see every day as a blessing to share through our lives to others, a privilege to do one more good and one less bad, sustain our inner peace and derive hope to pull us through the rest of the year.

I trust that we will be make it through this year with a better tale, a better perspective, and a better life.

Happy New Year!